Of Panya routes and Mats

Conductor,
as you may or may not have noted, you have ceased to be dear to me for reasons known very well to me and my fellow public transport users. It has been a while since you treated me in such a way that would move me to write you and I thought we were doing well...but alas, here we are. 
While I do enjoy the advisably healthy use of my feetsubishi and shoebaru, I do at times like to grace your motor vehicular mode of transportation with my presence. A presence of which you are now taking for granted. I understand that you have to do your best to keep from paying the hefty 200 bob fines (bribes) that the policemen on our roads impose hence the resulting use of miscellaneous roads that show up on no known map. However, when you do use such roads please resist the temptation or urge to ask me to get off at a place that is not the stage I asked to get off at before I got in. I know not what animals lurk out there and you know not what animal lurks within me, we shall fight.
Also, maybe, possibly, perhaps it would be smart to make sure that your door doesn't fall of as we turn the corner on the round about, or maybe,possibly, perhaps your motor vehicle doesn't look like it's been smoking up all night and has come to work high.

Avid public transport user